Last Day of Vacation...

my last day to enjoy it ~ so sad!!

I've been a little off track w/eating, drinking and exercise. I have not had my journal out in several days. I have been sticking to small portions and sometimes only one meal a day ~ just haven't been hungry.

I had my first fried foods since surgery last night. I didn't normally eat fried foods to begin with because they really don't agree with me. I did fine with them.

I also told hubby I could think of a reason NOT to tell friends and family about the lap band surgery. I don't have a problem telling peeps ~ if they think I'm weak ~ so be it ~ if they think I took the easy way out ~ so be it. My flesh is weak I know that and it hasn't been the easy way out so far! Anyways the reason I don't like to tell peeps is....they feel bad about not cooking something more healthy for me and they worry about making sure I have foods I can eat when invited for dinner. Now we don't get invited for dinner much so this isn't usually an eye opener for me but last night after dinner I explained to the couple why I wasn't eating more of the wonderful fried fish they had prepared and the man said to me something like "well I wish I had of known I would have cooked you something else" so I explained it's not about the food itself it's about the portion size ~ I can eat almost anything now but steak. I did pick up a celery stick w/pimento cheese in it w/o thinking and after chewing and chewing and chewing I had to spit the stringy stuff into my napkin but it was before dinner and we were just outside chatting so nobody noticed......well if they did notice they didn't say anything LOL.

Off to enjoy my day ;-)

HuMp DaY??

OK, my vacation is @ hump day and it totally stinks!! I miss HOME so much! I miss my FRIENDS and CHURCH FAMILY so much (one in the same really)!! Today was a very emotional day for me and it started about the time my feet hit the floor @ 7 am! By 9 AM my make up was gone.......who needs it anyways?! I cried all the way to the ville, cried on the cell w/my friend, stopped by MY CHURCH and cried some more on my buddie's shoulders. Met a friend @ SB and cried some more with her. Went off to the spa, got lost, left the spa, got lost. Met with my other girlfriend and cried some more. Got back to our host home and cried some more with the hubby (he wasn't crying I was). Why you might ask?? I guess just because I miss my peeps, my best girls, my support system, they are here for me but I miss seeing them with my eyes ya know what I mean?! Sorry for the tear flow on the computer screen.......I need to go to bed and try to sleep. On a good note.......no emotional eating today!! And yesterday I tried on a 16W dress and it was too big!! Glory be to HIM who is so faithful to me!! ;-) I am a sinner, saved by grace, a work in progress.....need I say more?!


***side note***
I read this blog and it sounds like I have no support system, friends or best girls in MO and that's not true!! It was my emotions typing above cuz I love my friends in MO!! ;-)

On Vacation

Yes, I am MIA!! I still haven't weighed myself since my last step on the home scale and that's ok ~ doesn't feel OK but it's really OK!! I have not journaled or exercised in a couple of days ~ too busy trying to fit friends into my visit....guess that's OK too. Poor hubby....I run and run and run and I forget I have a gizmo and he doesn't!! I'm sure he is about to starve most days!! LOL ;-)

Post-Op Day 36

It's Friday and I don't know my weight!! I'm so addicted to my morning weigh in now that this is driving me crazy not knowing what I weigh!! Such is life.

We have been eating out of the cooler since we left home, I had some scrambled eggs off the breakfast bar yesterday morning but this morning the only choice was those pre boiled rubbery type eggs........no thanks. So anyways we had lunch out. I opted for a crab bisque soup ~ ate a little of it ~ wasn't anything to jump up and down with joy over....(food is becoming that to me ~ less and less important). For dinner we ate here @ our hotel restaurant in Greensboro, NC. I had a southwestern chicken wrap. I ate half of it. Bite by bite, chewing chewing chewing. I had the fruit instead of the french fries or potato chips as my side dish. Good choice huh?!

While hubby is taking his test tomorrow I can a. hang pool side, b. go to a local spa for whatever I want, c. sleep all morning so I will be well rested to get us to SC!! We'll see....

What's My Weight?? Post-Op Day 35

weight........UNKNOWN!! ;-(

Where's my scale?! I'm in scale withdrawal!! After weighing myself every morning for 34 days here I am on vacation without my ball and chain!! Freedom?! Not feeling it. Feeling like I should have stepped up on that scale this morning! This will probable be the first vacation in my life that I've gone on and not gained 10 or 15 lbs!!

On a side note I woke up in Paducah KY this morning and will sleep in Cherokee, NC tonight!

Officially A Vacation Day! Post-Op Day 34

wt: 207.4 (minus 24.8 ~ oh so close!)

First day of my vacation. We will hit the road in the morning! I have to admit to being a little off track with a few bites of things last night. (One of the success tips I read and blogged says to admit when you messed up so here I am doing just that). I had a spoonful of ice cream. And later on a couple of handfuls of popcorn. I wasn't hungry (I should only eat when hungry) it was all a mind thing, a craving struggle and I lost the battle a wee little but nothing major. Before my gizmo it would have been a major loss for me. My mind would have clicked and said why not continue with eating whatever cuz you already blew it stupid! So there's my confession in a nutshell. Moving on as I'm over it! ;-)

We will be packing some gizmo friendly foods to take on the trip. I have 6 lunchables meat and cheese packs ~ geez that's 6 whole meals for me ~ not a snack ~ that just seems so weird to me. When I think of how I use to eat and know how I eat now it just blows me away! I am packing my 1/2C and 1/4C measuring cups as I am paranoid of eating more than 3/4C of food @ any one meal. (I'm probable a little overboard with my gizmo especially since I haven't had my first fill yet but that's me!) I will pack some high protein bars as well along with my journal cuz I have to keep track of everything....again a mind game I'm sure. It's like if I don't write it down I didn't eat it?! (it's my secret sin ya know, like the Lord doesn't know anything about that food I over ate on or like it doesn't show on my obese body!)

The cost of Lap Band....

I forgot to mention the bills and EOBs are rolling in....

Hospital bill for outpatient with overnight stay (less than 24 hours) $ 30,121.55
Anesthesia Bill $ 1,479.00


There's plenty more expected....like doctor bill for surgery, the radiation bill for seeing if the gizmo was in place and if I could swallow, etc...I'll post them as they roll in.

Let the Vacation Begin!! ;-)

wt: 207.8

(minus 24.4 lbs since starting Pre-Op diet)

Packing my bags, heading south....will be a few days probable before I post again but I'm so close to the minus 25 lb mark if I get it in the AM or while on vacation (different scales so who knows) I'll just have to post it with excitement!! Stay tuned.

<---doing the happy dance for vacation!!

Post-Op Day 31

wt: 208.8 (minus 23.4) I can smell ONEderland!! ;-)

Finally some movement on the scale! 2 whole pounds! Since I couldn't believe my eyes I wiped them again and stepped on the scale 2 more times....all came out the same weight so I got over my hesitance to make it an official number on my blog!

Took my pic today:

Post-Op Day 30

I've been hanging right above 210 for a few days now. I'm thinking no scale movement because we haven't been walking daily since hubby had surgery on Tuesday. Need to get back on track with exercise! Today I cleaned my closet out again (remember I did that a few weeks before surgery when I decided to start my new self journey) ~ the 18Ws were very loose so some of them went in the Goodwill bags. I was surprised to be able to fit into some of the clothes in my closet ~ nice surprise!! I had put off trying them on because I didn't want to be disappointed. I've been disappointed too many times before.....

Post-Op Day 29

Because this journey is all about ME and my new self.....and since I am no longer the baseball Mom who needs a 4 door SUV to tote boys and gear around my hubby made a deal on some new to me wheels.....besides the FORD Escape needed new floor mats...

;-)




...hubby says now I have a "doctor's wife's car"...

Post-Op Day 25

wt: 211.2 (lowest weight since 2006!)

Tonight we had grilled shrimp! I had a little cauliflower cooked up with it! LOL

POst-Op Day 24

wt: 213.8

8:45 am... up and adam ~ weight up again a little more today ~ I'm sure it's because the 28 day mark is only 4 days away...must remember to schedule my weigh in days and fills with Dr Minkin way before or a few days after my cycle or I'll be showing monthly gains!

For dinner we had blackened tuna steak ~ I also had 1/3 c succotash, 1/8 c black eye peas ~ yummy! Look Mom real food!! ;-)

Remember...it may look like more food than it is!! I use a small salad plate now for my meals....usually measure out 3/4 Cup food TOTAL for a meal. If not available I guess @ portion size.

Post-Op Day 23

213

wt was slightly up this morning but I'm thinking it's PMS coming on....oh yippee.

10:30 am rise and shine (well maybe not shine) ~ feeling like a hot flash is over me this morning. Nose is stuffy as well. I will do a protein drink for breakfast otherwise since it's so late in the day I'm afraid I won't meet my protein goal for today.

We have continued with our nightly walks of 2 miles each day. I can see a change in my thighs ~ can you believe there is some muscle under all that flab?? Our record time has been 36:06 and that was with a few jogging spurts hence the term "jalk" for this walk/jogging combo!

I did a few hand weights for arms last night before the walk and a few SECONDS of core exercises! My stomach has a TON of room for improvement! It is still sore in one spot - the port spot - other than that it's doing fine.

Post_Op Day 21

212.4

Today's weight is the lowest so far since surgery and I hope to be @ that 211 mark soon like I was back in August of 2006 ~ that was my lowest weight on the WW program.

Love Thursday mornings...I can move onto the next stage of foods! hehe Sad but you do get burned out on only eating certain foods. But there is hope cuz within 6 months you should be able to eat just about anything but in smaller amounts. I do like a variety of food ~ obviously!!

Today's list of new foods includes: thinly shaved deli meat, moist baked fish (includes tuna, salmon and white fish), seafood (includes shrimp, crab, and/or imitation seafood products), tofu or other soy products (none for me thanks), dried beans, peas or lentils cooked soft, soups without beef, cold cereals.

My goal is getting the protein needed in within the 4 small meals a day so I won't go for cold cereals and such foods that are not a good protein value.

I wake up thirsty every morning now and since no caffeine I opt for a 16 oz cold bottle of water to sip on the way to work now. I have had two lattes since surgery split with the hubby ~ we have them make it with skim milk and half the syrup and no whipped topping.

I do not feel deprived but wish I could eat salads, raw veggies and such cuz I do like them but I'm not so sure they would like me @ this time!

Post-Op Day 18

215

Monday thoughts:

This morning a friend @ work that's been on vacation asked to see my incisions ~ war wounds LOL ~ and there's nothing like showing your roll first thing on a Monday morning!

This afternoon I met up with a friend I worked with in SC. She was a soldier stationed in SC and is from St louis area. Her kids were with her. What a beautiful family she has! Anyways she treated me to a buffet dinner. First off it's been ages since I've been to a buffet....and I'm still on soft foods. The place took my dining out card so I got the kids rate of 7.99 (well actually she got the kids rate for me since she treated me) and that rate was much better than the $25.00 adult rate. I had a piece of fried talapia (I removed as much of the skin and breading as possible when I ate it). I got a scoop of black eyes peas, some mac & cheese and some mashed potatoes. I ate very slow, chewed well and made my focus the conversation over the food. The desserts didn't even tempt me. Overall I rate the evening a success ~ also came home and walked with hubby our normal 2 mile route! ;-) I had no stomach issues with this outing so I'm not sure what happened on the 4th of July that made such stomach pain.

Post-Op Day 16

wt: 216

It's Saturday and we slept in! ;-)

The port spot is still sore ~ tender ~ but looks fine.

Happy 4th of July!!

This afternoon we went to some friends house for a cook out. It was a fun small group of peeps. We talked chiropractic stuff and got some more information that will come in handy later on. As for food I did fine eating what was there ~ baked beans, 1 whole deviled egg and 4 pcs of pasta noodle salad stuff. I didn't bring my own special foods but I did bring a protein drink. The food went down with no problems but later on in the evening my stomach started hurting really bad. Not sure what happened there. I did have to ask to go home and was very apologetic to the hubby who told me it was ok. This was my first outing since the surgery that involved food, maybe next time I just won't eat anything so I don't have to take a chance on a painful stomach later.

Post-Op Day 15

Soft foods includes scrambled eggs.....so for the second day in a row I had them for breakfast thinned with skim milk and w/a half slice FF american cheese on them. Since they tasted like sunshine to me here's how I arranged my plate: (ssshhh don't tell mama I played with my food). Keep in mind the size/portion is smaller than it may appear ~ I no longer use a dinner plate but use the small salad plate instead ~ it's a mind game......




Hubby took my pic today:





He also took my measurements:

waist 39 1/2
hips 48 (fat butt)
chest 47
wrist 7 3/8
forearm 12 1/4
thigh 25
calf 19
ankle 9 1/2
upper arm 15 1/2 (the size of a normal persons thigh! geez....)
neck 15 1/2

my wt this morning was 216.6

Post-Op Day 14

Soft foods today!

<---doing the happy dance for the next stage of the diet program!!

I chewed and chewed and chewed my scrambled egg, 1/2 slice FF cheese and a splash of skim milk mixture so much I think I gave myself TMJ! However, it was good, it went down and it stayed down...

Lunch was 1/2 c cottage cheese.

Dinner was 1/4 c grilled salmon (about 2 oz) and 1/4 c canned cut green beans with some other little beans added in. I put this 1/2 cup of food on a small salad plate and it looked like a lot of food ~ the mind is a terrible thing and sometimes we just have to fool it!

Got the 2 mile walk in again tonight.

Now drinking my yummy NOT protein drink to get my protein in for the day.

Actually felt a little smaller in my clothes this morning. Hanging @ about 15 lbs down. Don't want to try on any smaller clothes as I don't want to be disappointed.

Post-Op Day 13

How did July get here so fast?! ;-P

I seem to be very tired this morning ~ not sure why ~ lack of calories? Lack of caffeine? Lack of real food?

I'm feeling that walk from last night ~ my hips have been screaming @ me since I went to bed. Such is life. Must move the flab.